its working!

my workout last night was rough. as soon as i got to the top of the stairs, i was stiff and tired. but my new favorite elliptical was open (they all were) and i decided to try out some of jenns interval training. during adds i upped either the ramp or resistance or both and pushed hard till the show was back on, and for several of the comedy sets i did the same thing, then returned to a lower setting but kept stepping quickly. i think the changes helped me to push for the whole hour even though i wasnt feeling it. (how often and i really going to be "feeling it" anyways, you know?)
61 minutes, 4.45 miles, 680 calories

i check my weight each day in the morning and sometimes in the evening, but i dont record it. i dont even use the memory setting my the scale. im saving that for wednesday mornings. but when i stepped on this morning i saw a sweet little surprise that i am looking forward to recording tomorrow. ive been feeling wishy-washy about doing a hard workout, or just a walk this evening because i have my appointment with anstine late this afternoon... but that little number was the encouragement i needed to go to the gym today. its working. i saw today, day 7, that its working. :)

and because its related, i should mention i had my very first (that i can remember) fat dream last night. people didnt like me. didnt want to sit nex to me in a crowded car. i was constantly eating something. none of that is me, none of it is reality. i wonder if my subconscious is trying to distance me from thinking i am fat. i dont like the word fat, i prefer overweight. i think fat is a mindset, and overweight is something that can be changed. i think the new me is going to have to fight the person ive let myself settle into and convince her that we really do need to change. if i were a person who put a lot of stock into dreams, thats what i would say anyway. :)

today is another day, and im looking forward to it.

my choice to remember today, is to be a blessing to those around me.