Thursday, September 30, 2010

long day, lots of kids

i was up at 530, out of bed at 6. devotions enjoyed before coffee and george fed before the boys got here at 7. then emma up and the day fell apart. jesse doesnt listen, emma cries and whines. toby was needy and george, what a gem, was good until almost 4. then he needed me, and to be held, and nothing else.

i took the kids for a walk, little ones in the stroller and big ones walking. it went pretty well, considering how it could have gone. no weights just yet, but im going to do them as soon as i post this.

i have the kids for another 9 hours tomorrow, then it is saturday. glorious saturday.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

true to my word

i am posting today not only because it is wednesday, but because i need the daily accountability again. so true to my word, a post is due.

unless i start getting up on time (at 7) again, this will have to wait until nap time, rather than after devotion. emma is awake and needs fed and changed when im finished with devotions so i just cant spare the time there when i dont get up until 8.

along with a daily post, i am also going to start some very small weight lifting to tone up my arms. i have not seen any inch decrease in my arms and i know i cant reduce fat in specific areas, but i can tone muscles in specific areas, which will help burn more fat. so i did just a couple sets of 10 reps with my five pounds weights of some bicept curls and flys and a little for my triceps. simple simple and im sure totally unconventional. ill have jason help me with form later. :)

as for wednesday, here we go. :) last wednesday, september 22 i weighed 189.4 pounds, and today i weigh 187.4! thats 2 more pounds lost, AND i have reached my pre emma weight! i weighed 187 when i got pregnant with emma in march 2008, two and a half years ago. what an accomplishment!

now ive got my eyes set on 170something and boy does it look good. i still have a ways to go, but week by week (though slower than i would like) i am getting there!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

weekly update and a change

this seems more like a weekly update. im going to change that. i have made a new habit of making the time for devotions each morning, and after devotions, i am going to make an update here. i think that is the best way to create a new habit.

that said, here is how this week went. on saturday i mowed our lawn, and the neighbors. its been at least 4 weeks, but i think closer to 6 since the back was mowed there so it took a little over 2 hours of very slow mowing to get it done. i was sweaty, im calling that a decent work out.

oh, and one day last week, thursday i think, i took emma for a walk around the block. thursday i think.

monday i swept and mopped all the floors downstairs. i wiped baseboards in the bathrooms and cleaned toilets and counters. i cleaned a lot. totally counts as a workout.

today, jason asked if i wanted to go to the gym before he ran, and even though i didnt (see previous post) i went. 42 minutes 3.57 miles 510 calories a pretty good workout after 12 days away from the gym. and today i am motivated to make some more changes.

and tomorrow is wednesday.

i dont want to.

i am going to the gym. jason said it would be okay if i went and he has the kids, so even though there isnt a bit of me that wants to go i am going to the gym.

Friday, September 24, 2010

daily devotions

wednesday morning i did not spend any time with God. i showered and got kids fed before the other kids arrived, and saved my time for naps. it seemed like a good idea, but oh it wasnt. it was such a stressful day.

yesterday and today, i have made a point of using the morning instead of the afternoon to get in a few minutes with my bible and i feel so much better. i think devotions should be prescribed to people with blood pressure issues, because even though george is screaming and emma just tossed her milk cup on the floor (for the billionth time i think) i know that the stress of this moment will not be the end of me.

and on wednesday, i wasnt so sure.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

10 weeks and what a change

my patience is very tried this morning. and its only just before eleven. oi.

nothing specific, there has just been a lot of squabbling between the kiddos (a lot a lot) and after several hours, it really gets to me. so i am praying for patience.

i am sure it doesnt help that because i got the kiddos early, i have not yet had time to sit down with my bible and my esther questions yet this morning. but, that is my nap time plan.

on another, much more encouraging note, i did it! today is wednesday, which means i step on the scale and record what it tells me. last wednesday september 15 i weighed 192 pounds. today, september 22 i weigh 189.4! thats 2.6 pounds this week, and a grand total of 24 pounds in 10 weeks. so so exciting. its been 2 and a half years since i weighed so little. ha, funny to call that a little number when i consider the goal, but still!

this week, i have decided it is important for me to get back to the gym on a more regular basis. i have been so touch and go, its not a good habit. and also, my back has started to ache again and since i dont have chiropractic coverage through our insurance, exercise is the next best option.

one more thing. on saturday i enjoyed the beth moore simulcast at our church. she did a fantastic job, and i had a great time. God gave me a sweet little reminder that he is taking care of things in my life. i am claiming the verse "he who began a good work in you, will carry it on to completion" and i feel like july 14 was a jump start to completing that work. also, when we sang the line "he can move the mountians, my gos is mighty to save, mighty to save" (even though i have heard the song a bazillion times before) it was laid on my heart that this whole DHS and DHW situation is such a mountian, but that doesnt mean that it is immovable.

over the last couple weeks, pastor has had some points that have gotten to me too. one was that our kids learn about God at home. the church is not the source, it is a resource to enphasise what is already being taught at home. and second, that our relationship with God should come up in conversation. BSU games come up in conversation, why doesnt faith? arent they both a part of our lives? so i have been working on those two things. it is a growing time in our house. ive felt led to challenge jasons faith to grow as well, and though i feel uncomfortable doing it, and i know i am not being asked to be a resource for his growth, i do need to encourage him so seek out ways to grow. we have always gone to church together, but this is otherwise a whole new aspect to our relationship and i cant wait to see the difference in our lives over the next few months.

Friday, September 17, 2010


its a good thing i got that quickie post in when i did on wednesday, otherwise it may have been two days late. :) so here is the recap of everything ive missed.

monday i took a walk with the kiddos to the park, (1.75 miles) then in the evening (quite late actually because we had small group) i went back to the rec. you saw that post that i had made it, and i stuck it out for 20 minutes 1.75 miles 250 calories. my biggest struggle about going to the gym right now is that each time i go, i am spending time away from jason that i would much rather be spending with him. but i am begining to feel better about that.

tuesday was the first day of bible study. i was nervous going, and when i first sat down there were mostly older woman and all of them knew one another. thank goodness several familiar faces showed up a little late, and amy (from sunday school who just had a tiny baby girl) sat next to me so we chatted a little bit. i even borrowed her pen because i didnt know i would need one to fill out my listening guide. bible study was great. i enjoy beth moore. shes funny, relate-able, and intelligent. i think i will enjoy this study. and, it comes with homework, so i have been using that as my devotions each morning, and i am starting to notice that i miss my regular reading, so i am going to just do both.

after a no so great weight on wednesday, i did make it to the gym again. 46 minutes 3.8 miles 543 calories. and it started to feel good again. (helps that good tv is starting up again... :) i really believe that this week i will be under 190. i can do it. how exciting will it be to weigh 186? thats 1 pound less than i weighed when i got pregnant with emma almost three years ago. i am so close.

this is a terribly messy mix up of a post, but thats how my week has been. (i had the boys three days this week too.) my daily schedule is getting better, i am not having as much trouble sticking to it, even though sometimes i do not like it. thats why there are three loads of laundry that need folded. but that happens once in a while.

and last, i am excited for the beth moore simulcast on saturday. i want to fully become the new person God is making me into, and learning how to do that from a woman who is so entertaining and interesting while sitting with friends seems like a great way to do it.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

quick like

i have sleeping and crying babies, but dont want to forget to get this in today.
this morning i weighed 192 even. that -.8 pounds for this week. not great. not my goal, but still moving in the right direction.

more on the new bible study and simulcast this weekend when i have only sleeping babies.

Monday, September 13, 2010

its the first time in 12 days, but im at the rec and determined.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

day 61 and when should i stop counting?

i dont think im ever going to stop counting. i will always be able to remember the day i started, because it was jenns birthday. anyways, just thought of that today.

it has been an emotional up and down weekend. and, the rec is closed and jason as been at work all weekend. 12 hours yesterday, and he went in after church this morning and will have to go back tonight after we work with the teens.

rachel complimented me at church again today. it was really nice to get to tell her that ive lost 20 pounds since i told her just after i started that i had set a big goal. and because i see myself all the time, i dont always get to notice the small changes. but i see her once a week, so she does. it was really nice.

i am signed up for the beth moore simulcast on saturday, and this morning i signed up for the tuesday morning bible study at church. i am reaching out. im making progress. im doing it.

i dont think i will make my goal for wednesday, because jaosn has worked all weekend, and small group is tomorrow night, that leaves only one day to get in a good work out. but we will see. im not giving up. i have made other positive changes this week, and thats the point, so im not going to be disappointed.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

down day

i had a very down day yesterday. i was worrying about my nephew, and disappointed that the outdoor shade jason and i built this week is too easily over powered by the wind (fail) and feeling generally down on myself. i was also down about yet another week of no gym, and entirely my own fault.

but- i did try to change my attitude. i mowed the neighbors lawn. its really long (they are getting divorced, both moved out, the house will likely foreclose) and needed cut, and they were always great neighbors to us so i decided to do something nice. then i remembered thats the third lawn i mowed this week. i did ours on saturday, and the rental on monday so i did actually get in three pretty good work outs after wednesday at the gym.

then i took a shower and poured myself a glass of ice tea (which a fly promptly drowned himself in... add that to the negative list) and sat out back on the swing for a while. i chatted with heidi online, and then mom called to tell me how the hearing went. it was nice to talk to heidi. we were both having off days and the company was good. but i found out from mom that the direction they are requesting to move with brayden means they are not looking to family placement right now. and that is a huge disappointment. (it is OPPLA or APPLA if you want to know.)

so, a roller coaster of a day yesterday.

and today is wednesday. last week i weighed 194 pounds. this morning when i stepped on the scale, i weighed 192.8 for a loss of 1.2 pounds. i am okay with that. its been quite a week, and i know i could do better in several areas but im still chipping away at that goal. this weeks loss put me over the 20 pound mark (20.6 pounds lost) and that is a good reason to smile.

i have a plan for this week (even though the rec closes TOMORROW for 5 days... ger) and i am hoping to see a number under 190 next week. i havent set a goal for the week for a while, and it will be nice to do that again.

so pray for me if you would, and i will keep going. im in Philippians this week, ive finished 1 Corinthians through Ephesians and have just been making my way through. i love 1 Corinthians. also, i bought a ticked for the beth moore simulcast next saturday. and on sunday i think i will sign up for the tuesday morning bible study, even if i have to swap cars with jesse once week to get all the kids there.

"therefore, my beloved brotheren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the lord."
1 Corinthians 15:58

"and let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart."
Galatians 6:9

Monday, September 6, 2010

another poor week

i am having a very hard time getting my act together now that jasons back in school and getting home around 7 each night.

also, on wednesday i started my first mirena period, which has had me feeling just a little off my normal self and blah blah blah excuses.

so, nada this weekend. i did mow the lawn on saturday. and pull weeds. and yesterday i helped jason with some building in the garage for my outdoor shade... but nothing on the workout side of things.

the rec closes for annual cleaning on thursday, and stays closed through sunday next week, so i better get my act together.

Thursday, September 2, 2010


jesse kept emma and george for me after his subbing interview yesterday so i could go to the gym.

50 minutes 4.15 miles 600 calories

but today i am TIRED. and i have been for a couple days. that usually means i am not getting enough iron in my diet and need to start taking my iron pills again. after a couple of days i usually start to feel better.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

7 weeks

its wednesday!

last week i weighted 197.2 pounds. this morning, september 1, i weigh 194 pounds. thats 3.2 pounds lost this week, and a total 7 week loss of 19.4 pounds! ive also lost 9 inches in the last 4 weeks.


thats just fantastic. really.

i have 45 pounds to go, and that doesnt seem so daunting. ive done that before. i gained 54 pounds with emma, and i lost all but about ten pounds. i am confident, and i have the power to make myself succeed.